Dear Geek,

We both know the only reason you want to travel alone is so you can spend all day with your nose in a book, next to the half empty 965g bottle of Nutella and Cheap Wine you bought the night before, blaming it on "Jet Lag". C'mon, this ain't no Jet Lag. You just can't get enough. That's fine though. Here are 6 tips and a half to keep you just "touristy" enough for the next few days.

0.5. Do Not Travel Alone

Let's face it, you're a geek; and if let to your own, you'll probably succumb to the call of the alluring purple passenger, whispering, then screaming in your ears: go check out that new book. Amanda mentioned it on the latest Get Booked episode, and it sounded so damn smooth. You shudder at the thought of it. That's 2 to 3 days off your trip, three (3) amazing days sure but, I digress.

So if at all possible, travel with someone who will get you out of your room and into the world.

Photo by Jenner VandenHoek / Unsplash

1.5. Hostel Over Hotel

If you're travelling for fun, your objectives should include meeting as many people as possible and hostels are great for that. You can spend time with fellow travellers, exchange funny stories over delicious (most probably not) local dishes and make new, interesting friends.

Unless you're rich, then go for a fancy ass hotel because well, Room Service; was there ever a better argument? Furthermore, Nabokov's prose just isn't purple enough to withstand three (3) strangers snoring in your freaking ears all night long; trust me.

A woman laying on her bed, eating breakfast on a blue and white bedspread in her bedroom in her apartment in Barcelona
Photo by Toa Heftiba / Unsplash

2.5. Meet Someone Interesting

Wherever you are, there are probably people around you. You cannot survive without Electricity and Wi-Fi, don't pretend otherwise. Now get out of your tiny ass room, walk through the hallway, then go say "Hi" to the wackiest most irrationaly inviting person you can locate in the first 5 seconds. S.He is probably the most intersting person in the room, and your contradictory nature will make you instantly like crazy mind.

It's OK if choose wrong; you can afford to make a mistake. Just say "Bye" and switch targets when one becomes available.

Photo by Cristian Newman / Unsplash

3.5 Be a Total BADASS

You understand this, nevertheless, a quote to help you see it a bit more clearly:

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”
Hunter S. Thompson

Photo by Andreas Fidler / Unsplash

Don't be stupid though, you still need to finish Amazon's list of 100, and then some.

4.5 Smoke Some Weed

I know what you're thinking, my hero Shakespeare didn't smoke weed, he was too busy being pale and avoiding the rain and eating shepherd's pie and whatnot ;). Why should I?

Well, you'll be happy to know that Shakespeare did (probably) get high from time to time. In fact, research conducted by Francis Thackeray et al. of the University of Witwatersrand in Johannesburg, unconvered some evidence that may speak to the "Bard of Avon's" penchant for "that which maketh time itself wither with sondering". (read this, or this for more information)

So grant yourself a favor, slow down those thoughts. DFTBA.

Photo by Dmitry Ermakov / Unsplash

5.5 Observe

There is so much you can learn by observing people. Consider dining out of the comfort of your home or spending time in a park, with your sketchbook preferably. Pick a good spot, and observe people in this strange new country as they go about their daily lives. Just don't be creepy about it. You might very well happen upon something worthy of your interest.

Tourist looking through a viewfinder on a windy day in New York City
Photo by Freddy Marschall / Unsplash

6.5 Edit your life

Remember that time you were walking with your backpack on your left shoulder thinking how on fleek you were, luggage in one hand and breakfast (Apple + Croissant + Water) in the other, and somehow thought you could still change the song you were listening to?

Remember how your feet hit the sidewalk? Sending your bags and breakfast flying in opposite directions?

Remember how you had to grab that stranger's ass to regain balance? Yh you did it to regain balance, only to regain balance, no other reason, nope.

Well, no one has to know friend; absolutely no one, not unless you want them to. Because you're "alone" and in "control" (those were air quotes btw), you can edit that shit right out of the timeline of your "bleek" life :)

Unless there's external footage, then you're effectively screwed.

Photo by Jakob Owens / Unsplash

Well, those were some weird tips to say the least. Rejoice, dear reader, for the Pareto principle has got your back. 2/10 of your time is all you need to explore this new and violently uneventful corner of the world. You do enough of those through your books anyways. And you still have the return leg of your trip to look forward to.

Now why don't you find out what Toni Morrison has been up to lately !?

I bet you can't wait for that flight home.